✨Good morning! Today is Tuesday, June 11, 2019, and we can’t believe someone actually fell for this.
BULLETIN: PEACE OUT, PLASTIC
• The Background
It’s official. Prime Minister Justin Trudeau finally announced a ban on single-use plastics in Canada, starting as early as 2021. The list of prohibited items is still not firmed up, but so far, it includes plastic bags, straws and cutlery. A government source revealed cotton swabs, drink stirrers, plates, fast-food containers, cups and balloon sticks might also be barred. According to Trudeau, “the federal government is moving forward on a science-based approach to establishing which harmful single-use plastics we will be eliminating as of 2021.” (Um, how about all of them?) CBC News
• What Else You Need to Know
The PM says Canada will follow the model chosen by the European Union, which also voted to ban plastic products. The Liberal government is urging companies who manufacture plastic products to take responsibility for recycling waste. Environment and Climate Change Canada says Canadians dispose of more than 34 million plastic bags every day, all of which end up in landfills and don’t decompose for as long as 1,000 years.
• What’s Next?
Nothing if the Conservatives win the next general election. Leader Andrew Scheer said the plan was a bunch of BS, criticizing the Liberals for not including “any kind of specifics about how [it] would be implemented or any kind of study on the impact on prices for consumers, on jobs, on how [it] would affect small businesses.” Conservatives plan to release their climate plan later this month.
• Holy Intolerance
In an alarming document, the Vatican declared its rejection of the notion that individuals can choose or change their genders. In its first public statement on gender theory, it also asserts the validity of the complementarity of men and women — the idea that men and women are intentionally created with distinct features that depend on one another. The ill-timed release of the document, during Pride Month, caused further uproar among LGBT Catholics, who immediately denounced the document as contributing to hatred, bigotry and violence against gay and trans individuals. The document, titled “Male and Female He Created Them,” was published by the Congregation for Catholic Education, which claimed it was intended to help teachers, parents, students and clergy address the “educational crisis” happening in the Catholic teaching of sexuality. CTV News
• Canada: Willy’s Free
In a move sure to make animal activists everywhere do a happy dance, the House of Commons passed the “Free Willy” bill yesterday. The legislation means that whales and dolphins can no longer be bred or kept in captivity and that Canadians can be found guilty for possession of marine mammals, whereas in the past, the only crime was poor treatment. However, don’t expect our marine attractions to shut their sh*t down just yet — there’s a grandfather clause in the bill that allows them to keep mammals that were born or conceived before the legislation was passed. Globe and Mail
• U.S.: The Right Ruling
The Supreme Court rejected a pair of cases challenging the federal law that requires the registration of gun silencers. SCOTUS denied a request to reconsider whether the firearm accessories are protected by the Second Amendment. (Finally some gun sanity in the U.S.) The ruling is particularly timely, as the gunman in the recent Virginia Beach massacre, who killed 12 people, used a silencer. Thankfully, the Trump administration urged the court not to take up the issue. Advocates of gun control claim silencers make it more difficult for first responders to locate the source of gunfire, as gun shots can sound distant and muffled. (They can just quiet the eff down.) CNN
📣 QUOTE OF THE DAY
“Does Cruise have the sprouts to fight, like he does in the movies?”
– Former UFC champion, Conor McGregor, puts in his two cents (and subsequently challenges Mark Wahlberg to a fight), after Justin Bieber challenges Tom Cruise to a UFC cage fight. McGregor also said his company would host the event should Cruise (or Wahlberg) accept. USA Today
• The Bay Buyout
A group of Hudson’s Bay shareholders, including Chairman Richard Baker, is proposing to take the company private, with a cash bid valued at $1.74 billion. Baker and a group of investors, including Rhone Capital LLC and WeWork Property Advisors, hold a 57% stake in the company, and are offering $9.45 per remaining share in cash for Hudson’s Bay. The company has long struggled with sluggish sales and a declining stock price, and this proposal would be a new approach to turn the company around. Shares of Hudson’s Bay surged 43% after the announcement was made. Financial Post
• Modern Mapping
Google Maps is upping its safety game by testing out new features that will alert you if your vehicle veers off-route by more than 500 metres. The new “off-route alerts” are currently exclusive to India, but if successful, will likely expand worldwide. The new feature will act as a safety function, and will also be particularly useful if a taxi driver isn’t taking you on the fastest route to your destination. (We’ve all been there.) The official release date has not yet been set. In other navigation news, Waze got a major upgrade with the integration of Google Assistant, meaning riders can now use the smart voice within the app. Google Assistant will make playing music and podcasts easier, but it will also allow access to many Waze-specific functions, like reporting traffic conditions, or specifying that you want to avoid tolls or highways when routing your destination. But most importantly, this new feature will make using Waze much safer, as drivers will be able to use the app hands-free. The Verge
• Soccer: Shut Out
Another Canadian team is officially on the hunt for a championship. The FIFA Women’s World Cup kicked off (pun totally intended) on Friday and the Canadian team made its first appearance yesterday, beating Cameroon 1–0. Kadeisha Buchanan managed to score Canada’s lone goal, keeping Christine Sinclair goalless in the opener and four points away from breaking the world record for the most international goals scored by any player ever – male or female. The whole country will be watching as Sinclair tries to break the record during Canada’s World Cup run (along with Nike, which is honouring Sinclair’s contributions to the sport and female athletes with this hit-you-right-in-the-feels promotional spot). Canada’s next game is Saturday at 3pm ET, when the team takes on New Zealand. Sportsnet
• Championship Update 🏀
↳ It was a close one, but the Toronto Raptors lost game five of the NBA Finals by just one point (106–105). Kevin Durant started the game, helping the Warriors take an early lead but went down in the second quarter (and will be getting an MRI at some point today). Game six is Thursday night at 9pm ET.
• The Best Years
Two of America’s most beloved stars are teaming up on a new comedy. Sandra Bullock and John Legend are working together on a new series for Amazon, based “loosely” on Bullock’s college years. The show’s being described as a “dramedy set in the world of music and dance” and will take place in the American deep south in the 1980s. It will follow the life of one “darkly off-beat young woman,” who “defies expectations and sets out in search of love, community, and an identity of her own.” The series will be produced by Bullock, Legend, Akiva Goldsman, and K.C. Perry, who will also serve as writer. Variety
• Avocado Ammunition
We’ve all witnessed the undeniable power of avocados. They are a supreme superfood, known for being a healthy fat with a delicious, creamy consistency. But, as an Israeli bank robber shows us, avocados also have the unique power of doubling as a weapon. A robber successfully burglarized two banks by threatening tellers with an avocado he claimed to be a grenade. The thief stole almost $8,400 with the help of his trusty avocado (which he painted black — how clever?), along with a misspelled handwritten note, which read “put the money in the bag or I’ll quickly throw this grenade.” Officials were able to track the criminal’s cell phone, and later identified him as a former convict who previously spent three years in jail for robbery. (So he’s toast?) Fox News
⚡️ STRAIGHT TO THE POINT
• A pilot is dead after the helicopter he was flying crash-landed on the top of a Manhattan skyscraper yesterday.
• The Justice Department has agreed to begin handing over documents related to POTUS’s potential obstruction of justice charge, narrowly avoiding a contempt charge for Attorney General William Barr.
• Salesforce has agreed to purchase Tableau Software for $15.7 billion, effectively making Seattle, WA the company’s second headquarters.
• The Canadian Broadcasting Corporation is teaming up with a production company Down Under to develop and produce content.
• After being shot in the back in the Dominican Republic, former Boston Red Sox slugger David Ortiz is recovering from surgery and will be flown back to Beantown as soon as possible.
• Let’s Get Corny
Arguably the most iconic summer food is being celebrated today: corn on the cob. No barbecue is complete without it. To commemorate the occasion, here are 40+ easy corn recipes, on and off the cob.
• Love Story
This isn’t a movie (yet) but it sure sounds like one.